Thursday, January 19, 2006
It's only the first week of school and I'm already so so busy. The homework is already starting to come thick and fast, plenty of readings to do on your own and stuff. The good thing is.. I seem to be enjoying all the courses I'm taking so far :) Even history, which I'd thought would be boring. Had elections yesterday and got into SSA exco, and we already have to plan for CNY dinner, which is next Sat. On top of that, I still have booth. Gonna be really really busy this sem and yes, I've decided not to overload at all. Was tempted to take piano lessons, but looking at the way things are right now, I don't think I can handle any more courses. (And yes, I also forgot that I've to apply for comp finance this spring..writing resume and essay..yikes!). Which just got me thinking again about whether I can finish earlier than 4 years. I wanted to finish in 3, but I think that's almost impossible, if I also want to double in psych. 3.5 looks more realistic, but yeah, I'm starting to change my mind to finishing in 4 years instead. I mean of course I want to finish school later (so that I don't have to work so soon), but the fees are expensive.
I just hope I will be able to enjoy this sem with all the workload and other stuff, like ACF and cell. And I wanna be able to do things to slack as well, like watching Friends/OC/Desperate Housewives, or exercising. And doing quiet time regularly. Right now, I haven't been able to do any of the above. But I guess it's a matter of time management huh. Something which I'm very bad at and will definitely have to be better in. I guess if you manage your time well, you should be able to finish your schoolwork and do other things that you really want to do as well. But if your time management sucks (like mine), you always find yourself swamped in schoolwork all the time (and very last-minute too), or other commitments. It doesn't help that I'm easily distracted too. Like talking on msn while I'm supposed to be doing homework. Sigh..guess I gotta buck up huh. Better time management..something that's been one of my new year resolutions for the past few years and which I've never really accomplished. Hope that will change this year.
Anyway, yesterday, during my psych freshman sem, the prof asked us to introduce ourselves and give a little background, like your major and where you come from. And I said, I was from Singapore. Yes, Singapore. Not Indonesia. I guess it's something that's been bugging me for a while. When people ask me which one I consider more as my home, I've always said I don't know. Well, maybe Indonesia, cos I mean that was where I was born. I'd always refer to Indonesia as "back home" and Singapore as just well..Singapore. But I'm really really not sure. During the winter break, I was practically slacking in Indonesia, and in Singapore, I was going out almost every other day with friends. I guess it's very hard to decide between two places - one where your family is, and the other where most of your friends are. And at some point, I will have to decide where I would want to live, work and settle down. Personally, I'd thought of working in US for a while, but I'm really not sure now. After just 1 sem here and being so homesick, I think I'd rather live somewhere close to my family and friends. Uncertainties uncertainties uncertainties. I guess I'll see what plans God have in store for me.
Sometimes, I'm not sure whether I'd have been better off if there weren't so many big changes in my life. Indonesia, Singapore, US. For my brothers too. Studying overseas means that you'll be away from your family and relatives and sometimes I wish that hadn't happened. Frankly, I hardly see my dad nowadays and I'm not close to him at all, which is really sad. And what about cny reunion? It's supposed to be a reunion with all your relatives, isn't it? But that rarely happens. Not possible when your relatives are also all over the place. Sigh.
On a lighter note, it feels good to be hanging out with them again. With jessica, xinghao, jiaqi and mingwei. We watched another Russell Peters clip, this time when he was in New York, on Monday night, and it was hilarious. Especially the last part, when he did a spoof on Bollywood movies. Haha couldn't stop laughing.
On a more serious note, I realize I'm a very judgemental person. I tend to pick out little flaws in people, from the little things they do or say. And that definitely has to stop.
I think I should start doing work now. I can foresee another late night haha. I've been sleep-deprived..sort of. And yikes, just saw the scratches on my knee from falling down while running last Sat. They look gross!
And new favorite song (courtesy of ktv last thurs): Fixing A Broken Heart. Nice song with beautiful lyrics.
posted by vivien at 12:15 AM