I really do hate making decisions, since I'm such an undecisive person. Especially those that can be life-changing. But life is full of them really. Why???!!!
Haha..my Internet phone line has been spoilt since the weekend, only got repaired just now. I really do my appreciate the broadband stuff in s'pore. Haha. Whatever. Really miss going online and talking to pple, I'm totally so hooked on computers! Yeah..anyway, I guess you really feel like going online after all the mugging and stuff. Hate mugging. Why must they have the exams right after the holidays? Bleah..it's just equal to having school without going to school at all, for me at least. Gotta stay home and mug. Yeah rite. Like I ever will. My concentration span is getting shorter and shorter, and before I know it, I'll be watching TV instead of studying physics. Bleah. Whatever. Haha. The only time I go out of the house is to play tennis or going out to have dinner, or going to church. Other than that, I stay at home. So boring. All cos of stupid Block Test. Whatever. Anyway, this morning has been quite a lousy one for me. I woke up quite early in the morning at 7, then decided to watch the tv, before taking shower and having breakfast. After that, I was supposed to go and mug till lunch. But unpredictably, I had a stomachache, which just didn't want to go away. So I ended up sleeping the whole morning. So stupid. Now I've so much stuff to do.
Haha..sigh. I'm wondering, how did the class chalet go? I hoped they all had fun. Looking at all the posts in the class blog, I think all of us are getting stressed up. C'mon..even relating full moon to the marks they'll get at Block Test? Haha.
Anyway..family gathering in Batu was very fun. Hmm..I always thought that ours was a large family, because my mum has like 5 brothers and 1 older sis, and yeah..I have lots of cousins. But then, when I actually started counting, it only came up to about 30+ in total for my mum's side. Quite few actually. Haha. Anyway, I had to meet up my cousins and uncle to fly there. It's quite fun catching up with all your relatives you know. Especially since I'm quite close to those cousins. Haha. Anyway, when we reached the place it was already dinner time. The others had arrived there earlier. So yeah..after that, we had dinner, and they celebrated my birthday =), which was really nice. They all bought me a birthday cake, complete with the candle, but i don't know, the cake wasn't really a cake, it's more like ice-cream cake. Haha. But it was really delicious =). Ah...just like old times, when my parents used to buy birthday cake for me when I was small. Haha. Yeah..I went back to Jakarta on Sunday, and my uncle, really, tried to convince me again, on the way to the airport, to go overseas instead of continuing with the A levels here, which he really thinks is useless anyway since I'll probably be going to the States for uni. Haha. I do not know. Right now, it's like 50-50 between staying and going. But I only have like a few more weeks more to decide. Sigh.
I guess gotta go mug now =(
Yeah! Today is my birthday, haha, seventeen! Really..how time flies. It's like suddenly you're seventeen, and like when you blink and open your eyes again, you probably have just graduated from university and going to start work. Really..time really flies. So fast. Life is getting faster and faster now i guess, now that we are busier and busier. Sigh. Don't really want to get old soon. Two more years and I'll be an adult. No more a teenager. Sigh. Being a teenager is really fun I guess, well, dats wat pple say anyway..teenage years are the best years of one's life. And I gotta agree whole-heartedly. Being an adult, well, I guess, as you grow older, you have more responsibilities, to put it simply.
Anyway, shall not talk abt depressing stuff anymore like getting old or anything. Shall totally enjoy my birthday. Well, now it's 11.30am here in Indonesia. Woke up at 8am..haha. It really has been a quiet birthday so far. Took shower, ate breakfast (consisting of long noodles, you know, with egg, mushrooms and a little bit of veggy..the usual stuff for birthdays), then did trig tutorial 3 (which totally drove me nuts..with all the sketches of graphs..hate sketching..dats why i'm totally lagging behind in my math tutorials..sigh), then after that, did some more packing for later on, and go online. Really. After lunch, gotta go airport after lunch. Sigh. Really. Don't really have time to do anything much. Sigh.
Hmm..just saw Kelly Clarkson's "Miss Independent" video. She's really good. There's no doubt she deserves to be the American Idol. She can sing high, and has the looks, whether she can dance or not remains to be seen though. She looks so different from her appearances in American Idol. I guess gotta expect the same thing if Ruben or Clay makes a music video. Ruben ruben..well well well, I wonder now since he has won that thing, whether he'll be forced to lose weight. Haha.
Oh well. Gotta have lunch now.
Bernice..you just reminded me..what about your friends back home? Oops...forgot to bring their letters! The letters that my friends back home gave my mum to give it to me in Singapore. Gotta reply. Oh no. Sheesh. Haha. But I'm going to see her in church here i think. So can reply orally I guess. Haha. Whatever.
It's really good to be back home. I guess. Nothing's changed, so that's a good thing I hope. Was kind of looking forward to the TV here. Well, we have sort of cable TV here, but then there's no ESPN! Even though the magazine says it should have. Sheesh. At least we've got MTV here, and StarMovies, and all those other movie channels I guess. Haha. Oh well. Don't know how I'm ever going to study here. For once, my parents really do pamper all of us when we go back home, cos it's like only a very short time that we're here, and then of course I gotta play tennis again, even I have internet connection here and can go online, although I must say the connection is much much much much much slower than the one in S'pore. Oh well.
My birthday is tmr! Of course, I'm excited. Birthdays only come once in a year. Seventeen. I guess there's no such thing as Sweet Seventeen, only Sweet Sixteen. But here, seventeen is the age that is celebrated most. Cos if you're seventeen, you get your IC, then can do a lot of things. But in S'pore, it's sixteen, not seventeen. Haha. Oh well. Must say thanks to all my friends for the presents, especially the class one. A Ruud van Nistelrooy poster and MU scarf! I would have definitely hang the poster up the wall..after all, he's my favourite player, and he's also quite handsome i think haha, but my room is too small. Oh well. My penpal aka Sylvester aka farmer also gave me something. Very nice actually. It's like this star-shaped bottle, filled like, you know, with water and glitter and stuff. I was actually admiring it, until I spotted the carrot in the middle. Oh well. The farmer really never stops farming, does he? Haha.
Anyway, since I will be away for the weekend, guess have to mug now. For once, really, must sit down and study. Argh!!! Hate this..
Just smile for me and let the day begin
You are the sunlight that lights my heart within
I’m sure that you’re an angel in disguise
Come take my hand and together we will ride
On the wings of love
Up and above the clouds
The only way to fly is
On the wings of love
On the wings of love
Only the two of us
Together flying high
Flying high up on the wings of love
You look at me and I begin to melt
Just like the snow when a ray of sun is felt
I’m crazy ‘bout you baby can’t you see?
I'm so delighted if you will come with me
On the wings of love
Up and above the clouds
The only way to fly is
On the wings of love
On the wings of love
Only the two of us
Together flying high
Flying high up on the wings of love
Yes, you belong to me
I’m yours exclusively
Right now we live
And breathe together
Inseparable it seems
We're flowing like a
Stream running, free travelling
On the wings of love
On the wings of love
Up and above the clouds
The only way to fly is
On the wings of love
On the wings of love
Only the two of us
Together flying high
Flying high up on the wings of love
Yupz...clay's song. Love this song a lot. Think it's become my favourite Clay song now. Don't know lah. Today has just been basically a bad day. Yesterday too. Wasted the whole of yesterday's evening and night reading a story book i just borrowed. Then, today, woke up at 11am, and being me, waking up super late will give me headache. And I have headache throughout the entire day, even till now. Sheesh. Ate breakfast like at 12. Then still felt my head spinning. Don't know lah. I couldn't take it. Didn't do any work till after lunch. Today was supposed to be mugging day. But ended up watching American Idol on tv anyway. Yeah..think Channel 5 is showing repeats of the show, so today, I watched the Group IV semifinal, where Joshua and Corey were the top 2 contestants. Wah..this episode really had a lot of contestants arguing back with the judges. Even though I think Simon is really too much sometimes, but he's always right, and those contestants think they're the best. What a stupid attitude! Anyway, after that, I tried doing physics tutorials until after dinner. But gave up halfway on the Ideal Gases. Not good. Today, my mind's really not on tutorials. Then, decided to do my packing. Really fed up. So many stuff to bring home. Basically, I'm just real pissed today lah. So, I decided to go online at midnight. No matter what, I really needed to go online, at least to calm myself down, hearing all those songs I downloaded =). Anyway, basically, that song on top, I think it's a really beautiful song. Heh..couldn't get the tune out of my head. Clay's voice is so powerful and erm..pure I guess. OK..right now it's like 1am and I gotta reach school at 7.30am for PW, so I figure I only have 5 hours of sleep the most. Sheesh. Not enough sleep. Too much sleep. When am I ever going to get the right amount of sleep each night? Whatever. At least my mood has improved after listening to all those songs. Haha. Whatever. Anyway, I'm not sure I'm now exactly looking forward to go home. Actually, don't know why, I'm a bit scared of going home. Got this fear inside me. Hmm..must not be scared. I must be strong. I know lah..I am actually scared of taking flights. It's never really appealed to me. But I don't have much choice I guess. Crap. Anyway, think I better go sleep now. Think it's too late for me to start burning another CD now. Haha. Must try to tell myself to cheer up lah. Can't be too stressed out all the time. So cheer up kay, Vivien!
Yeah..think I'm totally obsessed with the show, even though it just ended. Went to buy the CD today. Quite ex lah, $18.90. Haha..can just download the songs and burn it, but heck lah..the quality will not be so good i think. Then I'm now like downloading all the other songs. A lot. Plan to burn another CD of american idol songs. Haha. Oh well.
Yeah...the holidays are finally here! After a week of real stress in school =). What a relief! Haha. I'm going to destress for a few days first. It's time to let loose now, especially after the SAT on saturday. Heh..going to watch lots of television and spend lots of time online. Think I already spent about 5 hours watching television and another 5 hours on the Net yesterday haha. But still got lotssa things to do during the holidays. PW meetings, homework to be completed, and most importantly, study for the Block Test. Sigh..this is the first time ever I have to study during the holidays for exam. It's not fun. Even last year, when I was supposed to revise a little bit for the 'O' levels, I ended up watching World Cup throughout the entire holidays. Sigh. Never mind..shall enjoy myself first before getting down to work =).
Watched the Men's Singles French Open final last night. Yeah..Ferrero finally wins! After two semifinal and one final appearances. I still think he should have won last year, but too bad he had to play with an injured ankle and some nerves, so he lost to Albert Costa. This year, he managed to get a revenge. Sigh..too bad Kim Clijsters didn't win the women's singles. Preferred her to win instead of Justine Henin. But still, I must say I gotta rejoice that this time, there's no Williams sisters in the final. Yeah =) And Clijsters also won the Women's Doubles..well, at least that's a title for her on her 20th birthday. Must say it's really been a good French Open this year, with all the players I like winning =). Another smiley. =).
Just burned a Clay CD, sort of. All the songs he sang in American Idol. But think I must have done something a little wrong. Cos two of the first few problems had a few glitches. Argh..but still, the overall CD was OK. My first effort at burning a CD =). Which warrants another smiley. Haha. Seriously, why am I so smiley today? But I think I should have put more songs..cos now the CD only lasts for just over half an hour..so there's still plenty of space. Never mind lah. Can burn another CD, with all the others' songs and the group performances. Haha. Think I'm really obsessed with American Idol =). Missed American Idol a lot. Amazing Race has sort of compensated it, but you know, American Idol is a different kind of show, it's a singing contest and they perform great songs! Was kindda sad that Amanda and Chris got eliminated, wanted those two women to get eliminated. Sigh. Never mind. At least Millie & Chuck, and Jon & Al are still in the show. Love those two teams. I am OK with the gay couple lah, but can't stand those two bimbos with the funny names, models I think. Whatever lah. Haha. Going to go out later, and hopefully I can get the American Idol Season 2: All Time Classic American Love Songs cd, or whatever the title is. =) Great songs in that CD. Got that What the World Needs Now is Love and Clay's On The Wings of Love. Which reminds me.... Clay's and Ruben's singles are out in the US tomorrow. But think I'll just download the songs, no point buying the singles. As of now, at the Amazon.com, for number of orders, Clay's CD is still at No.1, whereas Ruben's is at #4 or 5, dunno which one lah. But see...Clay's one is still ahead. He should have won. Sigh..no point dwelling in the past lah. Anyway, I can't wait for Clay's CD, which is out in September! Haha..anyway..I shall shut up about American Idol for now...
Anyway, I'm still on a high. But heh..recently I've been inspired to memorise song lyrics don't know why lah. And I particularly like this one. Think it's really meaningful, as in you know, it's really inspirational kind of words, something to motivate you in life, when you happen to encounter problems and feel really down.
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
And when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Yup..the song hero. Haha...I'm playing the Clay CD I burned just now. Really love Bridge Over Troubled Water. Hmm..shall try to find the song lyrics, hopefully I can find them.
Haha..think that's all for me now. Really wrote a lot of crap. Don't know why I'm so hyper today lor. Slept at 3 this morning, cos I was watching tennis, then woke up so early at 9. Only 6 hours of sleep. Sigh. Haha. Never mind. I shall be happy today =). Another smiley. Whatever. I'm off for lunch now. Feeling really hungry. Shall end with a smile =).
Everybody's looking for that something
The one thing that makes it all complete
You find it in the strangest places
Places you never knew it could be
Some find it in the face of their children
Some find it in their lovers' eyes
Who can deny the joy it brings
When you've found that special thing
You're flying without wings
Some find it sharing every morning
Some find it in their solitary lives
You find it in the works of others
A simple line can make you laugh or cry
You find it in the deepest friendships
The kind you cherish all your lives
And when you know how much that means
You've found that special thing
You're flying without wings
So impossible as it may seem
You've got to fight for every dream
Cos who's to know
Which one you let go
Would make it all complete
Well for me it's waking up beside you
To watch the sun rise on your face
To know that I can say I love you
In any given time or place
It's little things that only I know
Those are the things that make you mine
And it's like flying without wings
Cos you're my special thing
I'm flying without wings
You're the place my life began
And you'll be where it ends
I'm flying without wings
And that's the joy you bring
I'm flying without wings
Haha..anyway, think I'm quite crazy to post the whole song lyrics of Flying Without Wings. MAn, I dun even really like the song. Haha. Even though I'm not exactly a huge Ruben fan, I must say he's done a better version of it than Westlife. Haha. Whatever.