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Monday, April 16, 2007

It has been a rather hectic weekend and I've been feeling quite miserable, unfortunately, all weekend. Christina Aguilera concert last night and a game of squash today did manage to keep my spirits up somehow. Ah well.

I don't know why I'm feeling so upset and angry at myself for no reason at all, and feeling so insecure of myself. Maybe it's just the accumulation of everything. Stress, having lots of things to do and barely anytime to catch my breath (it's like after I'm done with something, I still have other things to do), lack of sleep/sleeping late and I'm just so irritated at every single little thing. Perhaps I have also been burdened by my own expectations and others' (or are they just made up?) I don't know, I guess my mind is in a state of mess right now.

Comp finance case competition was..a disaster. Our team was totally outclassed by the other teams. Well, I suppose I may be a bit harsh on myself, but it's just that I feel I could have done better (and I guess it has something to do with the expectations of being a comp finance major and in my mind, not living up to those expectations). Oh well. Given the time constraints we had and considering we were so confused at the start, I guess what we came up with was already good enough.

I hate being so uncertain about everything. My summer plans are not confirmed yet and it is already almost the end of April! I have been consciously trying not to think about it, but it's always at the back of my mind and it is really driving me nuts. Also, there is that issue of finishing in 3 or 4 years. I keep flip-flopping between the two and we have to register for our courses soon. Sigh. I feel like I'm going crazy thinking so much about all these things.

On a brighter note, Christina Aguilera concert was fantastic! (Or sh-uperb haha). The opening acts (Danity Kane and Pussycat Dolls) were not bad. They performed half an hour each and actually started on time! We waited 45 minutes for Christina to appear, but the wait was definitely worth it. She performed a lot of songs from her album, but I was quite surprised she also did a bit of her old numbers (What A Girl Wants and Come On Over). She performed for about 90minutes and I enjoyed all the songs she sang. Apparently, she was a bit sick too, but it was still such a great performance and her voice is really good! Didn't know that she is actually from Pittsburgh, so I guess that made it extra special, especially when she dedicated a song she had written ("Oh Mother" from the Back to Basics album) to her mother, who was in the audience. I think 3 songs stood out - Hurt, Beautiful and Fighter - and my favorite was Beautiful. She was asking the audience to sing along with her and I guess the lyrics really hit me as she sang the song. This is my second concert and overall, I had a good time and it definitely was much better than the first one I went to (Avril Lavigne in Singapore).

I better start doing work soon. I barely had time to do anything else over the weekend. Ah well. Spring Carnival this week and I'm looking forward to it, even if it's just two days of no school. A little break is always good =) I hope the weather holds up so that we can play tennis! It's really crazy isn't it? It's snowing in April! And the weather really dampens my mood - so cold and gloomy. I have had enough of the cold. Give me back the warmth of the (usual) spring weather!

Everyday is so wonderful
And suddenly, it's hard to breathe
Now and then, I get insecure
From all the pain
I'm so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today

To all your friends you're delirious
So consumed in all your doom
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
The pieces gone
Left the puzzle undone
Ain't that the way it is

You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring you down
Cause you are beautiful in every single way
Yes words can't bring you down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today

No matter what we do
No matter what we say
We're the song inside the tune
Full of beautiful mistakes
And everywhere we go
The sun will always shine
But tomorrow we might awake
On the other side

'Cause we are beautiful
No matter what they say
Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no
We are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today

posted by vivien at 12:00 AM




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