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Sunday, February 27, 2005

This week has been much better for me. Even though I still sleep at weird hours, I think I've been getting much more sleep and towards the end of the week, I've also been more disciplined in my quiet time. Plus, MU won haha. As I've often said, soccer matches can either make or break my day.

Anyway, Huiling came over to my house yesterday. She wanted to save some of the songs on my com in her CD. I didn't know that my brother knows so many bands/singers. I haven't even heard of some of them (like those with weird names) and I think some of them are already dead. I think I only listen to like less than half of the songs on my com. I don't know why my bro dld so many songs, cos I think he didn't even listen to that many songs.

Today is Sunday. 5 more days to 4th March. Well, I'll just believe in those rumours. I'd be lying if I say I'm not worried about it. But I'll just leave it in God's hands. I should have my faith in my results. Sigh, easier said than done though.

posted by vivien at 12:10 AM
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Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Ah! MU lost! 0-1! At home! I certainly didn't expect them to lose. I thought they'd at least get a draw. After all, MU has such a good Champions League record at home. That was their first loss at Old Trafford in like 3 years. And it was another goalkeeping error which caused MU to lose. Sigh. At least they lost by only 1 goal. I think Werder Bremen lost 0-3 at home; looks like they're almost out. I'm still hanging on the memory of United winning 3-2 at Juventus after being 0-2 down. There's a hope at least haha. I think I was more shocked to see Didier Drogba got sent off (in the Barcelona-Chelsea match). I watched the last 30 minutes of the game and I think Barcelona are really good. They totally dominated the second half against a team like Chelsea.

Anyway, I find it really irritating that everytime I hear the sound of a lizard, I can't see the lizard anywhere. It's freaky. I've a big phobia of lizards ever since someone back home in the shop purposely told me when I was really small that once a lizard sticks to you, it'll stick to you permanently. Sigh.

Oh ya this week I'm getting more sleep :) haha. But quiet time ah.. that is still as bad as last week.

posted by vivien at 7:03 PM
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Saturday, February 19, 2005

I'm so glad this week is over! I need some rest right now. I've been so busy this week, so many things to do. And I'm very tired, exhausted. I've been sleeping even later this week, averaging less than 5 hours. I wonder how I even survived the week. I know, I broke my promises to myself, my mum and friends about sleeping earlier. Sigh, and I didn't even touch my Chinese stuff at all. Lots of homework for me to catch up on this coming week.

Anyway, I am so relieved that the prayer retreat went smoothly. I was supposed to help set up a station, but I had conveniently forgotten about it, hoping that the others would do the work. Turned out that no one did any work, so it was a last-minute rush to plan and complete everything. Since we didn't have much time left, we couldn't do much. Luckily, we managed to come up with a set-up and I think our station looked all right, even though there were only posters, verses and questions.

Then, I had to play the keyboard for worship this morning. I haven't played the piano for quite some time, and I didn't know how to play the chords. Thank goodness Zaneta was able to teach and help me with the chords. But I was still quite confused. There were just so many chords. Today, I messed up quite a bit. It was a bit hard for me to play during the faster songs, but I think I did okay for them. The slow songs were the ones that tripped me up, even though I had practised playing for them more than I did for the faster songs. I think I was just very nervous. And when I started making mistakes, I got all panicky and started making even more mistakes. When Daniel started singing at the wrong key for one of the songs, I completely didn't know what to do. Think I almost stopped playing for the whole song haha. But today is my first time and I had already expected to make mistakes. I guess I'll learn to play better with more practice.

One of the things I regretted not doing was to slow down and quieten myself. I just had so many things to do and so many things on my mind that I forgot to sit down and reflect. And yes, I barely did any quiet time this week. Think I only did for 2 days. That's very bad. It's not because of indiscipline or anything; I think I was just too tired from having slept so little. I usually do my quiet time before I sleep, but because I was so sleepy, I fell asleep reading the Bible. Other days, I'd just fall asleep doing other stuff. I've been sleeping at irregular times. It happened almost everyday this week. I think if I continue living like this, it's going to kill me slowly.

Channel 5 ISN'T going to show the MU-Milan match! They're showing Barcelona-Chelsea instead. It sucks! Okay I know Barca-Chelsea is going to be quite a good match, but I still want my MU's match! Argh! I was so looking forward to watching it. Showing the second leg only is going to be useless. Because I won't be able to watch it. My mum will be here. She will definitely not allow me to wake up in the morning to watch a match. Maybe I'm just not meant to watch the match. Sigh. Oh ya, MU beat Everton 2-0. Hooray!

I just remembered that I haven't written in my diary for like ages. I just had no time, or rather I fell asleep (usually write before I go to sleep). I shall attempt to write an entry tonight. Anyway, after so much rambling here, I shall take a nap. I need to sleep!

posted by vivien at 11:06 PM
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Thursday, February 17, 2005

I find myself worrying over every single little thing. Very bad. Anyway, Green Day's CD rocks! All the songs are really nice. No regrets buying the CD, even though my brother told me that he had burnt the CD (but I couldn't find it anyway). The lyrics are quite cheem and some of them are quite inappropriate for me to listen to, but I like the songs. The album is very punk-rockish. If you are into punk rock, you'll like the album.


ARE WE THE WAITING (Green Day)

Starry nights city light
Coming down over me
Skyscrapers and stargazers in my head
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting unknown
This dirty town was burning down in my dreams
Lost and found city bound in my dreams and screaming
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting and screaming
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting
Forget me nots and second thoughts
Live in isolation
Heads or tails and fairytales in my mind
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting unknown
The rage and love, the story of my life
The Jesus of suburbia is a lie and screaming
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting and screaming
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting unknown
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting and screaming
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting unknown
Are we we are, are we we are the waiting unknown

posted by vivien at 3:21 AM
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Monday, February 14, 2005

Today, or rather yesterday, was Valentine's Day! Went out with Ai Lian and Sin Hui for dinner at J8 and after dinner, we walked around. It was just nice to catch up and talk with them. I really miss hanging out with them. Anyway, while we were walking around, I suddenly decided I had to buy a CD. I just felt like buying something. I thought of buying the Grammy Nominees CD at first (had watched the Grammy Awards earlier), but since I have most of the songs on the computer, I bought Green Day's American Idiot instead. Green Day won Best Rock Album, so it should be quite a good album. After that, we wanted to take pictures, but like last time, we had problems finding a suitable place and someone to help us take pictures. It was like a while before we finally took pictures. We wanted to do a candid shot and it turned out really funny! Haha. The only blemish of the day came on the bus ride home. There was this very rude man, who shouted at me and practically shoved his way into the bus. Shall not elaborate. He totally ruined an otherwise perfect day for me.

I went to my aunt's house on Sunday to watch the MU-Man City match. I was so nervous during the first half. Man City were like having the better chances and they should have been ahead. I was worried MU wouldn't win. I was so relieved when Rooney scored (I think I actually screamed in joy haha). I didn't expect a second goal for MU. I think MU was lucky to get the second goal because it was actually an own goal by that outstanding City defender. The goal put my mind at ease though. MU's chances of winning the EPL is like super slim, but who knows. Anything can happen.

While I was over at my aunt's house, I discovered that AXN is showing a replay of the Amazing Race finale. Yay..I can now at least watch it. As for that Chinese show, I went ahead to watch the last episode without watching the second last episode. If I want to get the tape repaired, I have to wait for my mum to come back, go back and come back again. That would take about 2 months. I can't possibly wait that long to find out what happened in the end!

I'm now in my "late" mode again. I'm late for everything. For class, worship prac, meeting friends, going to sleep, etc. I know I've never been an early person, but I think my sense of timing is getting worse.

Anyway, I watched the Grammy Awards just now. The performances were like..WOW!!! My favourite performance was Alicia Keys' and her duet with Jamie Foxx. Alicia Keys is like so so talented; she can sing and play the piano incredibly well. I also quite like Green Day's performance of American Idiot and the opening performance (featuring Black Eyed Peas, Gwen Stefani & Eve, Los Lonely Boys, Maroon 5 and Franz Ferdinand). John Mayer won Song of the Year for Daughters. Apparently, the award is to recognize the songwriters of the song. I like the song, but I think it has, erm, very interesting lyrics. And Maroon 5 won Best New Artist :)

posted by vivien at 11:57 AM
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Saturday, February 12, 2005

I'm super irritated now. The tape I wanted to watch got stuck while I was trying to rewind it. Now I can't watch the Amazing Race season finale and the second last episode of this Chinese series I've been watching. How can I watch the last episode if I haven't watched the second last episode? Argh..irritating irritating irritating!!!

posted by vivien at 2:08 AM
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Tuesday, February 08, 2005

I'm now back in Indonesia, back for CNY. Just got here today, and will be going back on Thursday night. I know.. only 2 days. My parents had actually wanted us to go back to Singapore on Sunday, but my brother isn't allowed to skip school, so no choice but to go back on Thursday night. Anyway, it feels really good to be back. I just don't know why. I've been looking forward to this for such a long time. Maybe it's just the holiday, you know, to escape from the daily routines I have in Singapore. I hope my brother won't feel lonely, spending cny by himself in Perth. But I doubt he'll feel lonely.

I had promised to sleep earlier, but I haven't kept my promise yet. In fact, I have been sleeping even later these past two days. I don't know why, but there are just so many things for me to do! And I'm struggling to keep up with them. Sigh.

I feel very full today. Gosh, I really ate a lot today! Had a heavy breakfast, Burger King for lunch, airplane food (salad and brownie, didn't eat the chicken pie) and dinner. Just had dinner and of course, I ate a lot. Sigh. I've been reducing my rice intake, but I seem to be eating more on other stuff. I've been weighing myself quite a few times recently. My heart sank everytime the pointer went past 50. The bad news is, I'm not even exercising now. My excuse so far has been sore throat. But I promise to go to the gym next week onwards. *hopefully*

My mum just told me the Internet bill for December, when we were all back here. Gosh..it was like 7 digits (in rupiah). I didn't know it's gonna be so ex!

posted by vivien at 8:02 AM
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Saturday, February 05, 2005

Got home not too long ago from watching the Cheers final. Decided to go with Zhimei and her friends to watch Ronald Susilo play the men's doubles with Kendrick Lee. Ronald's match was like the last one, so when I got there, I still had to wait for his match to start. We sort of got fed up waiting and decided to find Ronald before his match. Oh before that, Zhimei's friend asked me what is "stupid" and "can we take a picture?" in Indonesian haha. Then when we found him, she immediately called him "stupid" in Indonesian, but she never said properly. Of course, Ronald knew what she was saying and just laughed at her. Then she asked "can we take a picture" in Indonesian. This time, it came out ok, but Ronald was like "no no no". Really funny haha. Ronald then started talking and making weird and lame comments. Think he's a really friendly and funny guy. But I was really quiet; am always like that around people I've never met before. So I didn't really talk much to him. Zhimei asked me to ask him whether he was nervous in Indonesian. So I did, and he told me I don't sound like I'm from Jakarta. Then I sound like I come from where? He asked me which part of Jakarta I live and stuff. Turns out that his good friend is staying in the same apartment as I am back home. Haha. Oh then Zhimei asked him if he knows which church we're from. We're like saying it's his brother school (cos he's from ACS I). He was like "ACS.. Presbyterian". Gosh..he doesn't even know that ACS is a Methodist school!

After that it was time for his match. He was so confident that he and Kendrick were going to win. So I was naturally quite surprised that their opponents actually led for most of the first set. They even reached 14 first. But after that, they made unforced errors, so Ronald and Kendrick won the first set. I thought that it would be easier in the second set. But I was so wrong. Ronald and Kendrick were like thrashed in the second set. Too many errors. But I suppose experience counts in the third set. It was 8-0 at the changeover and before long it was like 13-3. But they had problems closing out the match and allowed their opponents back. Eventually though, they managed to win 15-9. Must say it was quite an exciting match. Haven't watched a badminton match live in quite a long time.

After the prize presentation, went to take pictures. Zhimei and one of her friends also took pictures with Kendrick, but I don't know him at all, so I didn't take with him. Kendrick looked really fierce during the match, but I think he's also quite friendly.

MU's match is starting soon. Decided not to go to my aunt's house to watch the match cos I still have lots of stuff to do. I think I'll just listen to the match on BBC.

posted by vivien at 9:19 AM
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This week has been really tiring for me. I'm physically and mentally drained. There are just so many things that I have to do and I think I'm getting stressed. Unbelievable. My time management sucks as usual. I know I have to sleep earlier. An average of 5 hours of sleep isn't enough. But I just don't seem to get that point. After lunch, I'd just iron my clothes and I'd just spend the rest of the afternoon in front of the computer, doing absolutely nothing. Well, I have no good reason to be in front of the com for so long, but I'd just somehow find something to do with the com. And obviously I'd get carried away and end up having dinner at a later and later time. After dinner, I'd watch 2 hours of tv. After that? I'd try to do my Chinese stuff. Yup, only then. And even when I've nothing much to do and my eyelids feel heavy and I find myself dozing off at regular little intervals, I'd just refuse to sleep. It's like, in my mind, 12 is still too early to sleep. So I'd just somehow do something till it's like 2. That's when I think it's really really late, so I'd go to sleep.

My mum, who came back from Perth yesterday, reminded me that she spent quite an amount on my Chinese lessons. Sudden realization. Dare I say it? I think I've been wasting her money. I've been doing the homework all right, but I haven't been reading the notes and stuff. And the stack of stuff is growing.. Felt really guilty. But that's not the only guilt I felt during the week. Felt worse when I had to tell a white lie to my mum. She knew that I've been sleeping really late, so while she was away, she kept asking me what time I'd been sleeping. So I lied to her. I lied that I've been sleeping 1 or 2 hours earlier than I've actually been sleeping at. I didn't want to get scolded and I didn't want her to worry too much about me. Sigh.. after As, my life seems to be a complete mess.

Incoherent rambling. Anyway, I just saw the goals MU scored against Arsenal. How sweet! :)

posted by vivien at 1:57 AM
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Wednesday, February 02, 2005

MU has made my day. They beat Arsenal 4-2 away! I was expecting it to be a draw, so it was a pleasant surprise.

posted by vivien at 3:24 AM
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