I had a good time during Spring Carnival, going to all the booths and watching buggy and mobot haha, and the weather was excellent! Played tennis over the weekend (I so miss playing tennis) and was badly sunburned. But I'm not complaining :)
Our cell group also had a brother-sister cell group appreciation thing, and one of the guys cell groups would do something for a girls' cell group, and vice versa. So the guys cell group invited us to dinner at Korea Garden (it was actually a surprise - we were only told that the dress code was business casual) and they had actually booked the room upstairs, brought speakers so that there will be music during dinner (and that's how I got addicted to listening to N'Sync songs now) and decorated the room with pink streamers and the table with flower petals, candles and sweets! One word to describe it: romantic, and I was blown away haha. We played an ice-breaker game, which was rather funny - I will remember "chunky cheng", "chinese chay", "korean kevin" and "duckwing deborah(??)" haha. Food was rather slow and the people in the room next to us were drunk and butchering all the korean songs while attempting to ktv. But all in all, I had a good time. And 2 of the guys danced to N'Sync songs haha. To top it off, they gave us roses (mine have unfortunately withered) and body lotion from VS. Heh now, we have to do something for them too.
My course schedule is a mess now. I actually managed to register for all my courses and didn't get waitlisted in any, but I've just found out that Financial Engineering is going to clash with Finance and I have to take both next sem. Argh!! Basically, my schedule is not confirmed now, even though I have registered. I guess this is the price to pay for wanting to finish in 3 years..my course sequence is kindda messed up and as a result, I have a lot of conflicts. Ah well.
And yes, I can finally say that my summer plans are confirmed! Yayyyyy and thank you :)
It was a pleasant surprise actually when DB called me and offered me the internship. I had gotten an email earlier about the details of the internship, which surprised me because I hadn't received an offer yet, but the call came last night. And needless to say, I'm very very relieved about it and I'm actually quite excited too. So I'll be interning in Singapore (yay to that too..cos I've been rather homesick lately) and spending the first week in Hong Kong. There are lots of paperwork to sort out though, and I haven't actually signed the contract yet, even though I have accepted the offer.
But you know, I hope working in the investment banking industry won't compromise my character or values. After hearing the finer details of the offer, I guess it's easy to get carried away by money and material wealth. I suppose I just have to stay grounded and firm in my beliefs while working in an industry that's always striving for more.
And yes, it has definitely been a lesson of patience and humility all this while and I'm glad things work out in the end. It just goes to show that I should never lose hope in Him and that He always provides. Thank you Lord!
I don't know why I'm feeling so upset and angry at myself for no reason at all, and feeling so insecure of myself. Maybe it's just the accumulation of everything. Stress, having lots of things to do and barely anytime to catch my breath (it's like after I'm done with something, I still have other things to do), lack of sleep/sleeping late and I'm just so irritated at every single little thing. Perhaps I have also been burdened by my own expectations and others' (or are they just made up?) I don't know, I guess my mind is in a state of mess right now.
Comp finance case competition was..a disaster. Our team was totally outclassed by the other teams. Well, I suppose I may be a bit harsh on myself, but it's just that I feel I could have done better (and I guess it has something to do with the expectations of being a comp finance major and in my mind, not living up to those expectations). Oh well. Given the time constraints we had and considering we were so confused at the start, I guess what we came up with was already good enough.
I hate being so uncertain about everything. My summer plans are not confirmed yet and it is already almost the end of April! I have been consciously trying not to think about it, but it's always at the back of my mind and it is really driving me nuts. Also, there is that issue of finishing in 3 or 4 years. I keep flip-flopping between the two and we have to register for our courses soon. Sigh. I feel like I'm going crazy thinking so much about all these things.
On a brighter note, Christina Aguilera concert was fantastic! (Or sh-uperb haha). The opening acts (Danity Kane and Pussycat Dolls) were not bad. They performed half an hour each and actually started on time! We waited 45 minutes for Christina to appear, but the wait was definitely worth it. She performed a lot of songs from her album, but I was quite surprised she also did a bit of her old numbers (What A Girl Wants and Come On Over). She performed for about 90minutes and I enjoyed all the songs she sang. Apparently, she was a bit sick too, but it was still such a great performance and her voice is really good! Didn't know that she is actually from Pittsburgh, so I guess that made it extra special, especially when she dedicated a song she had written ("Oh Mother" from the Back to Basics album) to her mother, who was in the audience. I think 3 songs stood out - Hurt, Beautiful and Fighter - and my favorite was Beautiful. She was asking the audience to sing along with her and I guess the lyrics really hit me as she sang the song. This is my second concert and overall, I had a good time and it definitely was much better than the first one I went to (Avril Lavigne in Singapore).
I better start doing work soon. I barely had time to do anything else over the weekend. Ah well. Spring Carnival this week and I'm looking forward to it, even if it's just two days of no school. A little break is always good =) I hope the weather holds up so that we can play tennis! It's really crazy isn't it? It's snowing in April! And the weather really dampens my mood - so cold and gloomy. I have had enough of the cold. Give me back the warmth of the (usual) spring weather!
Everyday is so wonderful
And suddenly, it's hard to breathe
Now and then, I get insecure
From all the pain
I'm so ashamed
I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today
To all your friends you're delirious
So consumed in all your doom
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
The pieces gone
Left the puzzle undone
Ain't that the way it is
You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring you down
Cause you are beautiful in every single way
Yes words can't bring you down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today
No matter what we do
No matter what we say
We're the song inside the tune
Full of beautiful mistakes
And everywhere we go
The sun will always shine
But tomorrow we might awake
On the other side
'Cause we are beautiful
No matter what they say
Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no
We are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no
So don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today
Envy is never a good thing, and I should really stop all this comparing business.
Weather is getting cold again, and it is actually snowing! As I was walking to class last week, I saw the flowers wilting because of the cold and somehow, I started feeling a sense of pity/sadness? looking at all the pretty flowers dying. I hope the weather gets warmer soon so that the flowers can bloom again.
Back to work. Busy Thursday as usual, and it looks like I have to miss cell for the second straight week. Would have gone if not for the case competition meeting tonight. Case comp is driving me nuts because nobody knows what we are supposed to do and being the only comp finance major for a comp finance case comp, all my group members expect me to be able to come up with the answers. But I'm also at a loss as to what to do because frankly I've forgotten most of the stuff and I'm not sure how to apply the stuff I have learnt. I feel kindda bad about it really. Oh well.
I wonder how it must have felt
When David stood to face Goliath on a hill
I imagine that he shook with all his might
Until You took his hand, and held on tight
'Cause You were there, You were there
In the midst of danger's snare
You were there, You were there always
You were there when the hardest fight
Seemed so out of reach
Oh, You were there, You were always there
You were always there
So there he stood upon that hill
Abraham with knife in hand was poised to kill
But God in all his sovereignty had bigger plans
And just in time, You brought a lamb
'Cause You were there, You were there
In the midst of the unclear
You were there, you were there always
You were there when obedience
Seemed to not make sense
You were there, You were always there
You were always there
So haven't I learned that my ways
Aren't as high as Yours are
And You alone keep the universe
From crumbling into dust
You are God and though we would
Not have understood You
There You were
Hanging blameless on a cross
You would rather die than leave us in the dark
Every moment, every planned coincidence
Just all makes sense
With Your last breath
You were there, You were there
During history's darkest hour
You were there, You were there always
You were the Victor and the King
You were the power in David's swing
You were the calm in Abraham
You are the God who understands
You are the strength when we have none
You are the living, Holy one
You were, You are and You will always be
The Risen Lamb of God
[edited]
Oh well..I have calmed down a little I guess. I don't know why I have been feeling very irritated throughout the weekend. Perhaps it's because I'm tired (lack of sleep)? *shrug* Not to mention that I haven't done much work over the weekend, which leaves me with a mountain of work to clear for the week. I feel like I'm on the verge of losing my temper, but I've restrained myself each time. I hope I'll feel better later..
Anyway, watched Music and Lyrics last night. I have been wanting to watch that movie for some time, but I don't think it lived up to my expectations. I don't know..the movie was disappointing to me..maybe because I was in a rather bad mood? But in any case, I find Love Actually much better. The song from the movie, Way Back Into Love, did grow on me though. Didn't really like the song much when I had listened to it the first few times, but after watching the movie, I have grown to like the song and appreciate the lyrics.
I thought something that was said in the movie was interesting. Hugh Grant's character (forgot the name) was telling Drew Barrymore's character (forgot the name too) that he was puzzled why she would take such a long time to come up with just four lines of words, because she only has to think of words, which are totally meaningless in the context of a song, because it is the melody of the song which is the most important. Obviously, she totally disagreed with that comment and said that it is the lyrics which hold the real meaning of the song, and not the melody. The melody is like the first impressions you form of someone - you get a rough idea whether you like the song or not, but it is a very superficial opinion. It is only after you listen more into the song and pay attention to the lyrics that you know the real meaning of the song. And basically, it is the combination of the two, music and lyrics, that makes the song complete. You can't have one and not have the other.
It is similar to getting to know someone. The melody is like the first impressions you have of the person - superficial, but incomplete. And as you listen more closely to the lyrics, getting to know someone better, you begin to understand the person better and that combination is what influences the degree of friendship/relationship you have with the person, whether he/she is a best friend, someone you feel comfortable talking to and can confide in, or whether he/she is just another friend, an acquitance, someone you say hi, bye to.
Jiaqi's dad is here for the weekend and somehow, it makes me wish that my family can come visit me too! I guess I just want to be able to share a part of my life with them and I haven't seen them in a while too! I suppose you really don't appreciate what you have until you don't have it. And having being away from my family for the better part of my last few years, I have learned to appreciate my family much more.
Ah well. Going through such an emotional rollercoaster and I'm feeling sad and irritated at the same time. To borrow someone's words, it is like how everything hits me at the same time when I am down haha. What next?